Jobhunting

I should have just walked away. I mean, a job interview with multiple candidates at once. Each person desperately trying to impress the CEO behind his desk.

But I just couldn’t.

With the economic recession, solely created by God to fuck me, I have to take every opportunity to get a job. My original idea, just get a new loan to pay the last one off apparently no longer works. And since I still have no luck winning the lottery. I was left to a few options. Sell my soul, sell everything I have and put all the money on red on the roulette. Or try getting a job.

So there I sat, looking at three the other candidates beside me. I could see the first one was nervous, while the other two seemed pretty calm. I looked up as the man behind the big desk introduced himself as Mike.

After the usual introduction. Each of us had the time to brag about their skills and years of experience and why they would be a profit for the company.

Shaky Bob was your average ICT guy. Jim who sat next to him apparently was some sort of highly skilled Microsoft professional. Who for some strange reason wanted to try something new. Although his story sounded very unlikely, Mike looked interested. After Jim it was George’s turn. With a big smile on his face, he told us he had worked for company that gave advice on how companies could be more green.

Eyes focused on the floor I am trying to remain calm. I was about to hit George with my chair when it was my turn.

Still angry I told the story on how my previous boss had to sell his Mercedes for a fucking Hybrid and how half the company got fired because the new environmental friendly machines where like four times as expensive as the old ones. And half as fast. But at least we where saving the earth. I finished my rant and looked at Mike. After what looked like minutes he suddenly spoke again. ‘If you would win a million dollars tomorrow, what would you do with it?’

Not prepared for such a question Bob fell silent. ‘I would put the money on a bank’ he finally said. I smiled, thinking Iceland has some good banks. Mike nodded and looked at Jim. His answer was a Big house where he can happily life with his wife, beautiful children and dog. Seemingly pleased, Mike asked what George would do with the money. Trying not to burst into laughter I listened to him explaining how he would donate all the money to charity. Laughter quickly turned into disbelieve. When I saw Mike was all ears, listening to George on how he was saving the poor and unfortunate.

Deciding that I could never work for a boss who would fall for such crap I started ponder what to do with a million. I would probably buy GM so I can finally say I am the president of a company. And I would still have enough money to buy Wall Street. When it was finally my turn to tell Mike what I would do with the money. I Simply told him I would quit working. Thinking that would be enough for me to leave, Mike just frowned and asked a new question. ‘Name a person you would like to talk to. And what would you ask him?

Sighting that I had to waste more time in this room I listened to what the others had to say. As expected Jim admired his John Kennedy while Bob still wanted a chat with Bill Gates.

I Told myself I would leave at once ,if my guess was right on who George would choose. Ghandi or Jezus. Of course he picked the last one.

I stood up and left the room without saying a word. Closing the door hearing nothing. I walked towards the exit. Who would I like to talk to? I thought.

I don’t care, as long as he gives me my drink.