Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day. The day you do something special for your loved one. The day all singles hope to get a Valentine’s Day card. The day of love. The day a fucking rose costs 5 dollars instead of 2.

The day you wish your friends will leave you alone.

You see, for me Valentine’s Day is like some sort of bachelor party. Or April Fool’s Day. The joke is to make one of your friends believe they have a secret admirer. And I mean really, really believe. Unfortunately like bachelor parties. Every time the prank needs to be better and better. It is fun as long as you’re not the victim.

Bob was the first one. We used the internet to trap Bob into a blind date.

I will never forget that day. Bob had his hair cut and had been to a beauty salon. He even called me just a few minutes before they would meet in the park at the fountain. Telling me with a nervous voice that there better not be more girls with a rose on their jacket. Trying my best not to laugh I wished him luck. I don´t remember who came with the idea with the roses and meeting at the fountain. Yeah, might have been me.
It was noon, and the weather was nice. So it was crowded in the park. In the distance we saw Bob walking up the stairs towards us. Bob was looking at all the people walking and standing near the fountain. It took a while before he recognized us in the crowd. It only took a second before he spotted the rose each of us had on his jacket. Yeah, nothing scars a man more in life than being humiliated in public by his best friends.

The second year we had to try something else, because Bob’s Valentines encounter was still fresh in our memory. Luckily we had a few happy couples in our group. Dave and Maria where together for some years. They lived together but still were not married. The only problem Dave had, was that he was the jealous type. So at Valentine’s Day Maria was overwhelmed with gifts for a secret admirer. The final gift was this beautiful ring with a message saying ‘thanks for all the wonderful nights.’

That night, eyes all red, he came to my house. He told me what had happened. That he was going to find and kill someone. I managed to call the rest of the gang and tell them to get the hell over to my place. By the time Dave was in a state that he no longer wanted to live the doorbell rang. I opened the door and everyone rushed inside. It took some time before he understood what was happening.

Valentine’s Day. You’ve got to love it.

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